Wednesday, October 03, 2012

What Goes Around, Comes Around

My entire adult life:

Monday: "Look at how great smoky eyeliner looks on that famous person. I should use a smoky eyeliner!"

Tuesday: Trip to store.

Wednesday: "Why do I look like a tired gargoyle? I must have bought the wrong eyeliner."

Thursday: Trip to store.

Friday: "Maybe my eye needs to get used to me in smoky eyeliner."

Sunday: "Is it possible I have the flu?"

Monday: "Oh, screw it." (Sound of eyeliners being thrown into drawer with previous eyeliners.)

Six months later: "Look at how great smoky eyeliner looks on that famous person. I should use a smoky eyeliner!"

Six months and one day later: Trip to store. Flip through magazine in check-out line. "Her bangs are ADORABLE! Why did I ever grow mine out?"  


Blogger Mia said...

So true. I can't tell you how many times I've cut bangs only to discover anew that a) I don't look good with bangs; and b) I hate having hair on my face. But as soon as they grow out, there I am, looking at bang pictures again...I think it's a form of amnesia.

10:10 AM  
Blogger Ginger said...

For me it goes like this: "I love Sandra Bullock's hair. It's straight and all one length with bangs. It's adorable in a kind of '60s way. I'm going to grow my layers out."

I spend a year with my hair looking shaggy and unruly while I grow out the layers. I buy headbands and tons of hair products. I congratulate myself for my patience and console myself on the truly bad hair days by assuring myself that it will all be worth it in the end because once these layers are grown out, my hair is going to look fabulous!

A year later: "My hair is limp and flat when its all one length. I'm going to get it layered."

A month after that: "Katie Holmes looks so cute with her long straight hair and bangs. I want my hair long and straight with bangs."

This cycle has been repeating itself since I quit feathering my hair in 1980.

10:53 AM  
Anonymous Emily D said...

How I wish I could do eyeliner. You are not alone!

10:55 AM  
Anonymous Sherri said...

I've saved myself from the hair problem. I've found a hair stylist I like and trust, and I just tell her to do whatever she thinks best, that I don't want to think about it. It works out better that way.

11:26 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Before I read the last line, I was thinking, "Hey, that's me, only with hairstyles!" I can't tell you how many times I went into a salon with a photo of a Meg Ryan haircut and came out with a Carol Brady flip.

1:51 PM  
Blogger StevenIre said...

I was sorry I had such a bad haircut until I met a man who had no hair--and sported too much eyeliner. Ok, I didn’t really meet him, I saw him in one of the Adams Family movies. Come to think of it, he would still probably feel sorrier for me. In that case, I also think he wears too much pancake makeup. Now, we’re even. Not exactly Pilgrim's Progress.

1:07 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm that way with clothes, only I don't always make it to the store, and I look at everyday people. I am always looking around for people who are dressed the way I want to look, only, apparently, they don't have to wear sunscreen, and have way more patience to pull a look together. Also, eyeliner. I'd wear more eyeliner if I had the patience to get it right. I know some young teachers who wear the stuff caked on. I don't get that look. That's the raccoon eyeliner look. Okay, I'll stop talking now. :)

7:50 AM  
Blogger Karen Edmisten said...

I think you might look best with smoky bangs.

9:21 AM  
Blogger Mark Moran said...

Yes, this one escapes me, I'm proud to say.

5:09 PM  
Blogger Dawn Treude said...

I went to Sephora last week and yet another guy Sales Associate with perfectly done smokey eyes helped me. I'm a woman, older and have probably been wearing makeup longer than he's been alive.

This seems so unfair to me.

12:48 PM  

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